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Someone please call Gordon Ramsay
WHO: Xie Lian, OPEN
WHEN: During the traveling to Taravast
WHERE: On the road
WHAT: Xie Lian cooks.
WARNINGS: Xie Lian cooks.
A. Kitchen nightmares
[Being on the road with a large group of people is actually pretty nice, but Xie Lian is a bit wary of mixing too much with humans, for Reasons. Still, he is too gregarious and congenial not to, plus, he’s actually strong enough to carry a lot of things, and he’s quite good at chores, so he’s making himself helpful, in spite of everything.
They’ve all been given rations, and when they stop for food, he’ll try and cook a little something in a slightly banged up pot on a small fire. It started out as soup with dumplings, or at least that’s what Xie Lian will say if asked, but right now the unidentified lumps in the pot are definitely not soup. As for what they are…. well, that’s a mystery.
But if he sees someone approach, Xie Lian will smile kindly.]
Have you eaten?
((OOC : PLEASE NOTE THAT XIE LIAN’S COOKING IS CANONICALLY SO BAD that it rendered some very powerful humans unconscious for hours and they woke up feeling really bad, and it incapacitated a god badly enough that he spoke with mangled punctuation for weeks if not months afterwards. Feel free to play up the effects this would have on your character as randomly as you wish, from your run-of-the-mill diarrhea to full out KO.))
B. Waste Not
[After whoever’s unfortunate adventure with the food some of it has ended up on the floor, and well, Xie Lian doesn’t like wasting food. He’s been hungry a lot before, too many times to let food go to waste, and besides, it hasn’t been on the floor long.
He’ll pick up one of the meatbun-like lumps, and clean it off a bit with his sleeve… and then bite into it and munch.
Nom.]
C.Ghost food poisoning
[If you’ve been keeping an eye on the ghost army, you might have seen Xie Lian occasionally walking among them and talking to them, as normally as he talks to other people around.
And after that last cooking adventure, you might have noticed a few of the ghost soldiers are either entirely missing - not just flickering away to reappear later, just, gone, and others seem to avoid Xie Lian coming near them and looks decidedly less solid than they ever have, near transparent.
Xie Lian doesn’t seem to notice the slight ostracism of the ghosts - some of them are still quite happy to converse with him and swap stories, but it is quite noticeable if you look closely. And if Xie Lian offers food, the ghosts will politely, but firmly refuse it.
Word got out, apparently.]
D.Crimson Rain
[He probably should be resting but…
The blood rain brings back memories, so many of them, and he can’t help sneaking out from the shelter that has been found, his bamboo hat over his head as some sort of vague protection against the splatter of red. Even then, it barely covers him, but he knows it will all disappear in the morning, so it doesn’t matter if red flowers bloom on his sleeves as he gets pelted.
He’s holding out his hand, absentmindedly watching the drops of blood fall on his hand.]
San Lang… It can’t be you, right? If you were here, you would have found me by now.
[His other hand goes to grab the crystal ring on the chain around his neck. This is still safe, and he will make sure to keep it safe.]
WHEN: During the traveling to Taravast
WHERE: On the road
WHAT: Xie Lian cooks.
WARNINGS: Xie Lian cooks.
A. Kitchen nightmares
[Being on the road with a large group of people is actually pretty nice, but Xie Lian is a bit wary of mixing too much with humans, for Reasons. Still, he is too gregarious and congenial not to, plus, he’s actually strong enough to carry a lot of things, and he’s quite good at chores, so he’s making himself helpful, in spite of everything.
They’ve all been given rations, and when they stop for food, he’ll try and cook a little something in a slightly banged up pot on a small fire. It started out as soup with dumplings, or at least that’s what Xie Lian will say if asked, but right now the unidentified lumps in the pot are definitely not soup. As for what they are…. well, that’s a mystery.
But if he sees someone approach, Xie Lian will smile kindly.]
Have you eaten?
((OOC : PLEASE NOTE THAT XIE LIAN’S COOKING IS CANONICALLY SO BAD that it rendered some very powerful humans unconscious for hours and they woke up feeling really bad, and it incapacitated a god badly enough that he spoke with mangled punctuation for weeks if not months afterwards. Feel free to play up the effects this would have on your character as randomly as you wish, from your run-of-the-mill diarrhea to full out KO.))
B. Waste Not
[After whoever’s unfortunate adventure with the food some of it has ended up on the floor, and well, Xie Lian doesn’t like wasting food. He’s been hungry a lot before, too many times to let food go to waste, and besides, it hasn’t been on the floor long.
He’ll pick up one of the meatbun-like lumps, and clean it off a bit with his sleeve… and then bite into it and munch.
Nom.]
C.Ghost food poisoning
[If you’ve been keeping an eye on the ghost army, you might have seen Xie Lian occasionally walking among them and talking to them, as normally as he talks to other people around.
And after that last cooking adventure, you might have noticed a few of the ghost soldiers are either entirely missing - not just flickering away to reappear later, just, gone, and others seem to avoid Xie Lian coming near them and looks decidedly less solid than they ever have, near transparent.
Xie Lian doesn’t seem to notice the slight ostracism of the ghosts - some of them are still quite happy to converse with him and swap stories, but it is quite noticeable if you look closely. And if Xie Lian offers food, the ghosts will politely, but firmly refuse it.
Word got out, apparently.]
D.Crimson Rain
[He probably should be resting but…
The blood rain brings back memories, so many of them, and he can’t help sneaking out from the shelter that has been found, his bamboo hat over his head as some sort of vague protection against the splatter of red. Even then, it barely covers him, but he knows it will all disappear in the morning, so it doesn’t matter if red flowers bloom on his sleeves as he gets pelted.
He’s holding out his hand, absentmindedly watching the drops of blood fall on his hand.]
San Lang… It can’t be you, right? If you were here, you would have found me by now.
[His other hand goes to grab the crystal ring on the chain around his neck. This is still safe, and he will make sure to keep it safe.]
B
Are you sure that's still going to be alright to eat?
[ Lowering her hand as she asked the question Lily looked more skeptical than shocked - though it certainly didn't strike her as the most sterile choice if she were pressed for an opinion. In truth, the stew itself hadn't looked at all appealing, and though she thought Xie Lian was a lovely person, Lily was glad that when she'd been offered the stew she hadn't told a lie when she told him she'd already eaten.
The hasty retreat of the person who'd retreated from the stew, discarding it hastily enough for one of the dumpling-things to fall in the first place didn't speak volumes for it either, and though she wasn't eating she lingered by the fire for light and warmth long enough to see it for herself.
Trying to keep her expression neutral and not at all dubious she cocked her head. ]
Where did you learn to cook?
no subject
['Dubious' is honestly one of the kindest way to describe Xie Lian's cooking. 'Borderline lethal' is probably more accurate, not that he's really aware of that.]
... Well, here and there, and mostly on my own. For a long time I had other people cooking for me, and when I ended up on my own, I sort of had to learn on the go, and I never had a lot of money, so I made do with what I could find.
no subject
[ Life since arrival was a good deal more spartan than Lily was used to, whose experience with roughing it began and ended with the camping trips she took with her family on summer holiday.
Casting another glance in the direction of the stew pot Lily tilted her head. ]
Have the soldiers enjoyed it? I'm sorry to miss out, I made fried millet cakes earlier, they're awful but they go down quickly so you don't have to think too much about eating millet.
no subject
[And he's going to laugh awkwardly at that question.]
Apparently, no one else but me seems to be able to stomach it. I know I' not the best cook there is, but people are having a hard time with it.
no subject
I'm sure it's not that bad. [ She tried to sound encouraging and smiled at him, but the idea of cooking being so bad ghosts were having troubles was rather mind-boggling. ]
You used things from the same supply everyone else cooks from, it can't possibly be terrible.
no subject
[Which really seems to be a lot more power than it should be able to exert because again, it's just food.]
I can just finish it myself, it's fine. I already promised not to cook anymore.
no subject
[ The last thing she wanted was to make Xie Lian feel worse about his cooking. While she was grateful she had not eaten any, she thought he was very considerate to think of the rest of the group, soldiers included and cook in the first place.
Letting the matter go Lily gave Xie Lian an encouraging smile. ]
At least in Taravast, we stand a chance of running into something more than millet.
no subject
[And that's all you can ask of food, really. It being good is just a nice bonus.]