westwhere | everything is happening right now

"...alive and yet he has not aged, and he somehow inherits the ability of his undead mother," Wrath speaks slowly, because the Undead should not be able to transfer their power as a biological mother might to their child. Once they are dead, the connection should shift, and yet- This world continues to elude his understanding of both life and death, of the creatures that can exist in both. He trusts Wei Wuxian's senses - they have always aligned in a sense with his own when it comes to reading what is dead, what is alive, but-

This city in particular seems to be making it all more unbalanced due to the protection that prevented anyone from being able to see, living versus dead.

"The man in white clearly has a great deal of responsibility. In all truth, for all the answers we have received, we are left with only further questions." And it is unlikely these questions will be answered in this city, but they have to lay it all to rest one way or another.

This place is not sustainable - much of it is not real, not alive ( a child's playhouse like they found in the room where the mannequins are made).

Wrath echos some the same thoughts Five had. He isn't undead but he isn't human. Five didn't know what he was dealing with when he confronted him, and he underestimated him after Diego managed to land a killing blow to his father. The extent of his powers are unknown. Neither of his parents could manipulate the mind and create alternate realities. For a moment he wonders if Lila could mimic that sort of power, but he doesn't know if it's wise to put that idea in her head.

He doesn't even know if he can fight against something that took complete control of him, more than once. They induced fear in him with a touch, trapped him in a fantasy born of his own memories, and struck him down with disease that overtook him in seconds. The only reason he survived them was because someone found him in time.

"He got too close." He doesn't elaborate what he means, but as he moves to grab his cup he's reminded of the wounds that weren't all miraculously healed by the magic in the tower. They took control of someone he trusted, who literally stabbed him in the back. As much as he likes to boast how he refuses to die until he accomplishes his goal, his fate slipped out of his hands and he's yet to feel like he's regained his grasp on it.

That's what he was attempting to do when he got back to the apartment, and the risks of attempting his own solutions seem less and less important. He's so tired of being in pain, of losing his family, that he's close to doing anything to make it stop. He holds in a breath and looks back at Wrath. If he told him everything he's thinking, he already knows what he'd say.

"Are you going to see Emilia?" he asks in a more casual tone, like all it took was a sip of coffee to stop him from spiraling. "I need her to make me some more candles."

Wrath's gaze narrows at the statement without elaboration, and now he is watching Five carefully like he is searching for weakness, for any sign of pain at all. What exactly does that mean? He got too close. Five doesn't elaborate, and Wrath does not know that he would even if asked.

For the moment, Wrath allows for the change of subject, but he files the information away regardless, keeping an eye on Five, not entirely trusting the casual way he speaks.

The question gives him the slightest of pauses though his expression doesn't shift at all despite the aching distance between Wrath and his wife at the moment. They have not seen each other nor spoke beyond check-ins since their last painful conversation regarding the curse, regarding what Emilia does not know and what Wrath has not allowed himself to choose, because she does not know it. Now she has shut him out entirely. Any attempt he makes to reach out, she responds in an icy fashion that is all too familiar to him, and he no longer intends to simply wait for her to be ready. They have already lost such time - more than she could know.

In true demon fashion and evasiveness, however, he answers the question with one of his own.

"Do you not have enough candles?"

He does not know that he has seen Five without one since their arrival.

Five tilts his head at the way he dodges the question. It might have gotten by most people, but he's familiar with the technique. With everything that's been going on, he hasn't been paying attention to their usual visitors. Now that he thinks about it, he hasn't seen the two them together in a while.

"Not anymore. That's one of the last, and this isn't a time to run out." He gestures to the candle burning near him that has been burning for hours already. If not for that, he could have passed out almost as soon as he got back from the Tower. He needs them to stay focused and alert, especially now that he's potentially made their situation worse.

He frowns at Wrath, suddenly concerned that he's missing something that's going to become a real issue for him. Allison hasn't mentioned anything about it and she sees Emilia all the time.

"...Why? Is there a shortage I should know about?"

"...not currently. However, our next location may fail to have the supplies needed."

So if Five does truly have a need for these candles, they may very well run out of them or the ability to create more of them at any time. It is something to keep in mind as Wrath begins to wonder whether or not he is truly addicted to them. And yes, Wrath shifts the focus away from Emilia at present, because he is not going to stop by her home to see her.

She would simply kick him out again. He has to come up with another way of seeing her, and he knows she'll be interested in helping cure this city whatever it takes.

"And, I believe, sleep is vital to mortals at some point - candle or no candle. Have you slept?"

Going too long without it is certainly not going to help with Five's current mindset regardless of the candles. It isn't as if he can carry them lit on his person without potentially damaging his clothing.

If Five didn't think he was deflecting to keep from asking about Emilia, he might take more offense to his concern. For one thing, if supplies are going to be running low, it's more of a reason to stock up now. Especially before shit inevitably hits the fan because they decided to stay. And for another, there's far too much going on to waste precious hours sleeping. Isn't it enough that he's taking the time to eat?

"I was asleep for days during the Unwinding, and you saw how that turned out." It wasn't a restful sleep, but he distinctly remembers waking up in the Mouse House. The implication is that he hasn't slept since then, but the candles work just fine.

"We have no way of knowing what power they have over dreams." He hadn't thought of it before, but now that he does, it's worth noting. Then he chews on the edge of his sandwich that he's started to lose steam on and adds a little quieter, "And I have too much work to do."

Wrath's gaze narrows at him, because he doesn't think he has to say the Unwinding does not count as the type of sleep he is referring to. So he does not state that out loud, but it is clearly in his expression as he surveys Five.

"...the candles can only go so far."

But if he is running out of them and Emilia is not available to make more...

Well. He may be forced to get rest instead. All the more reason to not go to the shop to retrieve them. There is a pause as Wrath wonders about whether or not he should say what he will next, but better to take Five's mind off the candles that Wrath will not be fetching.

"I intend to look into... methods for ending the curse when we have left this city behind."

Five had thought he'd made a good enough point about why he needed to do whatever he needed to do to stay awake and alert, and how the candles are the easiest solution. So when he's met with skepticism and doubt, he doesn't have an immediate response. Wrath has a reason to be concerned after the mistake he made, and he hasn't explained his math so he understands how important all this is, but it still doesn't sit right. They have enough to do without worrying about him.

The candles work. That's good enough for now.

Then he shifts the subject and he's distracted from his argument. He leans forward and watches Wrath for a hint of what that means. They haven't talked about what Five learned since their first day in the city, but if that's what he means, he must have figured something out. At least that's what he assumes. It's unfortunate that he still has to ask, given the circumstances.

"Your curse?"

"...yes."

It has been the source of his arguments with Emilia. She can feel him holding back, and he is limited on what he can share, limited in so many ways by the curse that locks both him and Emilia in its grasp. He can no longer afford to wait, to see if another place may provide more answers. He has answers from his time in Taravast. There are spells and rituals he might use, and he doubts it will break the curse entirely, but even if it can chip away at it, it could change everything.

If he could simply call his wife by what she truly is, if he could release some of her power or her memories, if he could show her anything at all, it would pull them from this standstill they are stuck in. The yearning inside to simply be able to speak freely, to have Emilia understand and to know rattles within the walls of his chest against his ribcage. Wrath's expression remains neutral but somber as he speaks, quieter.

"It would have to wait until we are free from this city. Our concerns at present are greater."

They are too wrapped up in their current worries here. Wrath continues to speak, and he is careful in his speech for multiple reasons (what will he be allowed to say?)

"But I believe I can use what I learned at Taravast to transfer some of that curse. It would not break it completely - there are... too many pieces. However," There's a pause then, "I would need the piece of mirror inside of you to transfer a portion of the curse within."

He lifts his gaze to meet Five's then, understanding he asks something Five has wrestled to do for himself all this time. "I am asking if you would be willing, and it does not have to be decided now."

Five can tell before he starts that there's another reason he's bringing it up to him now. Anyone else and he'd be more apprehensive, but he can relate to how a curse can eat away at you, no matter what else is going on. Wrath also benefits from being one of the only people he trusts, going back a lifetime. So he's attentive as he listens, aided by the nearby candle that helps his focus.

Opposed to the last time, when he was drunk when this subject came up. He might have promised to help him with it back then, if he could. He's not completely sure he said that out loud, but he'd honestly meant to, for all he's done for him and his family. It just never occurred to him that he'd already have found a way to take him up on that until he asks.

From the look on his face, his proposal isn't something Five was prepared for. He silently adjusts his posture and makes an effort to mask the suddenly onslaught of anxiety that twists inside him. Over time he's gotten better at ignoring the curse, but he's acutely aware of the anguish he's absorbed when it's pointed out.

Wrath knows it's not as simple as handing the mirror over. It's so much of a risk that Five opted to suffer for months on end because the alternative seemed more dangerous. There's no guarantee that it can be removed without complications, and he can't afford to be out of commission if there are. At the same time, Wrath is the one who often reminds him that it's getting worse. He doesn't have to be told; he feel it getting closer to as bad as it ever got in Taravast.

Wrath was there, so he might be able to sense how close that is. Which means there's another slight possibility that he doesn't want to acknowledge. If Wrath doesn't think Five will come to him on his own until he snaps, he could be using a favor to convince him to let him remove it. But the more he considers it, the more he dismisses that fear. Of anyone, Wrath wouldn't try to manipulate him for his own good.

He still doesn't know how it could possibly help Wrath's curse, and he can't, without knowing what it is. He takes a long breath and exhales.

"...You think it'll make enough of a difference?"

Wrath can sense Five's anxiety, and beyond that, he is aware that the mirror has currently absorbed so much anguish to be similar to its state as it was in Taravast. There is a reason he said it did not have to be decided now. It's been shown in the past to negatively affect Five's choices due to its effect, and Wrath wants Five to be able to choose this freely if he does choose it at all. Unfortunately, they have no reliable way to release more anguish from the mirror inside of him, and so it may only continue to get worse.

"I do though I cannot be certain." He wants that to be clear as well that this is its own gamble, its own risk. He thinks it may help based. Wrath believes that it can be utilized, but he may be wrong - there is always that chance when using different types of magic to affect one another. "I am operating off of what I have learned, what I know of magic and curses within my own world, but all of that is limited due to the constraints of the curse."

However, the mirror inside of Five does have the capacity to absorb, and part of his curse was at least that Wrath would forget all but his hate, that if he should ever love, he would lose that as well. Not to mention the lock on Emilia, the molding to make her hate him should she ever meet him again. He won't know the best way to use that mirror until he examines the mirror himself when it is outside of Five, but he does think it can be used.

"And as we spoke about before, there is risk to you as well." He knows Five won't have forgotten, but Wrath wants to make it clear that he understands this is something big he asks. "As I mentioned, it does not have to be decided now, and it is likely better that it isn't given the state of your own curse and this city."

But he wanted to ask now so Five would have time to settle with it, think about it.

It makes him all the more curious what kind of curse Wrath has if he thinks the mirror can help it. The piece inside of Five is only a fraction of the mirror it came from, but he can't say it doesn't have the capacity to absorb a huge amount of anguish over time. He's fairly sure the Merchant knew what it did, and why the dead man in the lake needed to be put out of his misery.

There's no telling what it will look like if Wrath attempts to pull it out, since it wasn't a physical object when it attached to him. His efforts to study it came up short, but he's barely mentioned it to a handful of others from their group. Wrath is the only one left who seems able to really understand what it's doing to him.

"We both know the state isn't going to get better unless I can drain it again, and then it's just another matter of time." He can be logical about that much. All he's been able to do is delay the inevitable as it slowly saps away his sanity. It was never his intention to do nothing about it, but he's very aware of what it took to transfer the curse from the man in the lake. There's a reason he didn't trust the other necromancers.

"If removing it... if I die, I'd need to be brought back. I'm not done."

Wrath nods in acknowledgement of that awareness. It will not get better without a method of draining it, and they see no method currently within this city. It will only continue to get worse, but that does not mean he wants to influence Five's choice too much. There will be a cost regardless, and that should not be thrown away or hidden, but acknowledged along with the rest of what they have spoken about.

His gaze is sharp as it lands on Five then. He is a little too casual about his own death for Wrath's liking. Five is not immortal, and he is not part of Wrath's House, which means he is very capable of dying and ceasing to exist. Wrath has never experienced grief (he was made to forget before he could experience grief before), and he would not like to start.

"If I thought it would kill you, I would not have asked."

He would like to make that much clear immediately.

"We would have healers on hand. All precautions would be taken care of ahead of time."

It isn't the first time he's thought the curse might kill him someday, either when he tried to remove it or when it drove him insane again and he made a mistake he couldn't come back from. As long as he gets his siblings back and on their way back home before that happens, that's all that matters.

He's also realistic. The mirror has been knotted up inside him for so long and caused him so much suffering that it's hard to imagine removing it can be an easy process. Not to mention he's still physically a child. A scrawny one at that. There's a finite amount of abuse this body can take.

He might still agree if they could guarantee that they'd bring him back, if it came to it. (As long as Allison is around, he thinks she'd make sure they did.) There's a reason he framed it like a deal, so it means something that Wrath wouldn't consider it. Outright refusing to gamble with his life. He doesn't feel comfortable with the idea of healers standing by, but it's a nice thing to say.

"...Well, Lila didn't mention anything about a curse, or my untimely death. Could be that she just hasn't gotten around to it, but that's more than I had before." She could still be from an alternate timeline where this didn't happen, but he's trying to take the good news where he can. Because he's almost positive it gets worse from there.

"I'll be surprised if it can help, but it'd be a pleasant change if it wasn't all for nothing." He meets his gaze to consider him for a long moment. Then takes a sip of coffee and nods. "Ask me again when we're out of this hellhole."

One way or another, the mirror does need to be removed from Five, because continuing on in this way, it can only end in disaster of one kind or another. They are both aware of it so Wrath does not bother to mention the full extent of how this might turn out if the curse continues on its path of sapping up all the despair it can hold.

However, it is meaningful to Wrath that Five should genuinely consider it now if only because it may end up helping Wrath with his own curse. If he did not think it would help at all, he would not have brought it up, but he does think he should be able to filter some of that curse into the mirror whether his own or Emilia's.

"I will." For the time being, they both have a great deal to focus on before they can hope to leave this place. There's another pause then as he adds genuinely: "Thank you."

Whatever he ends up deciding, Wrath appreciates the consideration regardless. And he will appreciate it all the more if after all this time, he finally has a method to fight back against the curse that has stolen so much from him: wings and then far worse, his wife.

Five makes a small hum at the gratitude. It doesn't totally sit right with him. Not many people thank him, and he isn't sure this merits one. He's learned how to cope with his curse, but he can never fully put it out of his mind. Removing it is a hard decision that he knew would come eventually. Without Wrath, he'd be looking at some less favorable options.

He takes another drink from his mug and tosses the idea around. The mirror absorbs anguish, so does that mean Wrath's causes him pain? If it does, Five thought he would have noticed in the time they've lived together. Maybe he's thinking he can alter it.

"If it works, I suppose you might be able to track down others like it." He never thought about doing the same, but he could feel something from the broken ones in the lighthouse. Whatever magic was in them reacted to his curse, but he doesn't know if it was that or the man in white that trapped him in that hall. "Anurr was responsible for transferring the mirror's magic into the man in the lake, maybe he knows something."

"...I will keep that in mind should it be effective - not that I particularly like the idea of speaking to him."

Wrath is not a social demon. If he had it his way, he would stay in his ice palace and never attend any of his brothers many boring parties, but he is aware, of course, of the necessity of politics when it comes to getting what one wants to achieve. A silver tongue can go a long way though he is long past the point of trying to turn himself entirely into something he isn't simply to get someone else's cooperation.

It's a reason he has never bothered going to Hatisse for anything further. He is aware what would be the most effective way to get her to respond more truthfully, and he has no interest.

Another thoughtful pause as they haven't spoken of this yet recently, "No one has come for the tongue?"

It seems many wished to in the group at one point.

Wrath is only one of the first friends Five has made in nearly six decades of life, so it's fair to say socializing wasn't his idea. Anurr owes him. He's been careful about when he's choosing to cash in his favor, but he could probably get something out of him without revealing too much.

He doesn't even think Anurr knows that he's been carrying around his curse all this time. It never once occurred to him to ask for help with it, even if he has the power to remove it. He isn't stupid enough to trust him.

Or any of them, as Wrath is quick to remind him just how quickly they turned.

"Not since we got here." Even then he thought they had much bigger problems, but it didn't take long for them to be distracted by the actual threats in the city. "I doubt it's the last I've heard about it. If they found out what happened in the tower, they'd use it as an excuse."

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