He let out a hard breath, tilting his head as he frowned at Mingyu, rubbing a thumb over the man’s cheek.
He wanted to ask And what would you care if I do?, but he couldn’t quite bring himself to voice it. Instead, he murmured:
“I have seen too many many fail to take any responsibility, or to shun difficulty when it was presented to them. I watched the nobles of a city take the only ship and flee to leave the rest of the people to suffer and die by the plague. I know what it looks like when I don’t do anything, Mingyu. My fault or not. And if I survive, I have to live both with what I’ve done, and what I haven’t done.” A pause, and a sigh, finally leaning back just a little, though he was still touching Mingyu’s face, as if he couldn’t quite get himself to let go.
“I’ve met my death before, Mingyu. I know what will matter most to me, when I meet it again.”
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He wanted to ask And what would you care if I do?, but he couldn’t quite bring himself to voice it. Instead, he murmured:
“I have seen too many many fail to take any responsibility, or to shun difficulty when it was presented to them. I watched the nobles of a city take the only ship and flee to leave the rest of the people to suffer and die by the plague. I know what it looks like when I don’t do anything, Mingyu. My fault or not. And if I survive, I have to live both with what I’ve done, and what I haven’t done.” A pause, and a sigh, finally leaning back just a little, though he was still touching Mingyu’s face, as if he couldn’t quite get himself to let go.
“I’ve met my death before, Mingyu. I know what will matter most to me, when I meet it again.”